Keeping a marriage happy means treating it like THIS


Marriage is great but man it's hard work! My husband Jaime and I have been married for a little over 4 years now and it's wonderful but there of course have been some difficult times. That's normal though of course. Conflict is natural and at times it can be healthy. Conflict itself really isn't the problem. It's how often that conflict happens is where we should be focusing. Dr. John Gottman has dedicated his time and research at the University of Washington discovering what makes "successful marriages" work, according to Art of Manliness, and his data shows that 70% of the conflicts that arise are "unresolvable" and will last "the entire lifetime" of the couple involved. Don't let that discourage you though! This is where treating your marriage like a "relationship bank account" comes into play.

When your shared "account" is "low on funds," there's a heavier presence of "negative" interactions than "positive" ones. If all that negativity goes on too long your account will get "overdrawn" and that's what we need to avoid. If you're a numbers person think of it in a 5:1 ratio. A couple that routinely has five positive interactions for every negative one will ultimately succeed. Once again life is all about balance! You can read more at ArtOfManliness.com.

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